Keep the Fires Burning


Saturday mornings lure my husband and me awake, not long after the sun rises, for our anticipated weekly date. Getting out of bed without waking several children is the trick, however. It never fails that we may go to sleep as a couple, but we wake as mere pieces of a giant people puzzle.

One at a time our little ones crawl into our bed in the middle of the night for warm snuggles, entangling us together. Therefore, it takes some complicated maneuvering to slip free without rousing the whole bunch.

Our goal is to get out the door without waking anyone under ten. The sandman glues our teen’s eyes shut and skips our young ones altogether, so we whisper and move with hushed caution.

And make our escape . . . out the door for hours . . . together . . . alone.

My husband and I have been dating on Saturday mornings for years. It is the time we come together and listen to each other. We tell stories, make plans, reconnect, drink coffee, and keep the fires burning. We fight the Enemy, who would love to destroy our marriage, by dating regularly, deliberately, and intentionally.

Our kids take up most of our time, energy, and money, but that does not mean that our relationship as husband and wife is less important than our parental roles. In fact, maintaining a vibrant, healthy, happy marriage is key to raising whole, stable, well-rounded children.

There are a million reasons not to date your spouse regularly, especially when homeschooling is thrown into the mix of responsibilities, but the few good reasons trump all other excuses. Your marriage is important. Your kids need you and your honey to love each other. They need you to set the example for them. A vibrant marriage is a part of mature, intelligent, intentional parenting.

When you and your spouse date is up to you. We chose Saturday mornings for several reasons:

  1. Saturday mornings are less hectic than Friday nights.
  2. Popular restaurants offer a quiet atmosphere in the mornings.
  3. Kids are too tired to get into much trouble at home on Saturday mornings.
  4. It is a good time to chat with the spouse, because phones are not ringing yet.
  5. The world is still.

My honey and I hope to set a good example for our kids. Our little people know where we are hiding when they wake on Saturday mornings, and I believe it comforts them to know that Mommy and Daddy enjoy each other so often.

Make a happy marriage your priority this school year, and be amazed at the improvement in your kids’ schoolwork.

Terri Bonin – has written 3 posts on this site.
Terri is happily married to her favorite dentist, Troy Bonin. Together they have ten children that keep their home school lively. She is the author of Live, Love, Laugh and Laundry? and she writes for

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