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Lessons from the Lighthouse

Diana Waring

Texas Home School Coalition Association REVIEW © August 2008

While visiting the fascinating Mystic Seaport in Connecticut, my husband quietly and on-the-sly purchased a poster for me that I have “oooohed” and “aaaahed” over many times. It’s a photograph by Jean Guichard—it shows a tall, round lighthouse in France being engulfed by towering ocean waves. As the waves break upon and smother the masonry structure, there is a tremendous spray—showing the ocean’s absolutely incredible force as it hits the lighthouse. Immediately upon our arrival back home, I framed this masterpiece of photography and prominently placed it where even a casual visitor will have to sit up and take notice.

As folks gaze at this striking photo, the first question that always comes up is, "How on earth did they build this lighthouse in the waves?" and secondly, "How on earth did they build this lighthouse strong enough to withstand the waves?" Good questions. I harbor a secret longing—maybe not so secret since I tell everyone I meet—to visit this lighthouse and discover how it remains standing.

Even without visiting it, however, there are some obvious facts to observe about this lighthouse:

1.  It was thoughtfully and carefully built.

2.  The very strongest materials were used throughout.

3.  It was not built at the time of storms and high waves.

4.  The foundation is upon a rock.

One day while gazing enraptured upon this scene, I suddenly saw how applicable this lighthouse poster is to home schooling families. The lessons of the lighthouse are lessons for us all.

The first observation concerning the lighthouse is that it was thoughtfully and carefully built. What is your motivation for homeschooling? Is it merely that your children will know more history facts than their peers? … be able to calculate mathematics with greater ease? … discover the benefits of legible handwriting? … avoid peer pressure? … save money by not having to buy fad clothing?

Or is it that they might be equipped to walk through life as wise, mature, educated, discipled, disciplined, creative, productive, caring, thoughtful adults?

As we thoughtfully consider the reasons, implications, and goals of home schooling, it helps us make better decisions about the day-to-day process of home schooling. Holding the goals in mind helps us recognize when to stick with the plan and when to be flexible.

For instance, during a home school high school day, our oldest son Isaac was totally bummed out. Something had happened, and he was trying to deal with it all alone. When I questioned him, he told me the bare bones of what was happening. My first reaction was, "But Isaac, it’s already time to be doing school—forget about your troubles, and let’s get on with the day!" However, the Lord reminded me that the bigger picture in our home schooling was not finishing a certain amount of work each day, but rather, helping our children to walk in the ways of the Lord. Hmmm.

"Isaac, please put your shoes on; we’re taking a walk."

"Huh?" Blank stare. "Okay, Mom ... But I thought you said to start school?"

"I know. Humor me."

So, off we went, into the wild blue yonder, to talk for nearly two hours about how we deal with problems in our lives, how the Lord works so wonderfully in the midst of our trials, and the things that I have learned in my own struggles. From totally bummed out to joyfully encouraged—in only two home school hours! A small price to pay for all the productivity he was able to achieve during the remainder of the day.

If we know why we are homeschooling and what our goals are, we are able to make thoughtful and careful decisions that will stand the test of time.

The second observation about the lighthouse is that the very strongest materials were used throughout. We know that God’s ways are not our ways, so it should come as no surprise that His materials are not the same as our materials in the building blocks of life.

Galatians 5:22-23 says, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control...."

James 3:17 says, "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy."

I Corinthians 13:4-7 says, "Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."

Proverbs 9:10 says, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding."

Sometimes as home schoolers we find that our thoughts are mainly taken up with what math curriculum to use, how to teach reading, where to find unit study materials, and how to get it all done by the end of the year! I understand. I have spent much of my home schooling life trying to unearth the perfect curriculum.

However, if we want our children to be able to withstand the storms of life and function as lighthouses in the world, we need to put first things first. Math curricula, phonics programs, and unit studies are all important, but they are not the most important things that we will teach our children. The lessons of love, joy, peace, long-suffering, the fear of the Lord, kindness, patience, self-control, etc., are the lessons that will build sturdiness into our children. The nice thing about these lessons is that they can happen simultaneously with whatever else you are studying.

"Michael, what are you doing?"

"Um, reading my history book."

"Ah. In the midst of your reading, did you realize that you were living in a war zone?"

"Huh?"

"Your room looks like WWIII." Smile.

"Cute, Mom." Return smile, plus twinkle in eyes.

From that beginning, we were able to talk about how important it is to develop the self-control to put our clothes away, pick up our books, and make our beds. I explained to Michael that in my own life I have discovered that having a tidy room is a reflection of my relationship with God. It must have been a teachable moment, because it seems to have stuck!

As we build abilities and attitudes into our children’s lives, we must remember that it is God’s ways and His words that matter most in the midst of our hectic home schooling. Observation number three: The lighthouse was not built at the time of storms and high waves.

The time to learn something is not the moment your life depends upon it! We need to teach our children in a day-by-day, hour-by-hour, moment-by-moment fashion what it is to be honest, have integrity, show perseverance, be obedient, use diligence, and more.

My daughter Melody got a black Labrador puppy years ago, which she named Lord Peter Wimsey. Since I have always had small dogs (read: dachshunds), I was no help to her in training fifty pounds of squirming dog-life. So, out of necessity, we enrolled in a dog obedience class. It was fascinating—both to learn what dog trainers know and to watch my daughter learn to train her own puppy.

The most important lesson Melody learned was the necessity of training her puppy on a daily basis. As she repeated over and over the commands—"come," "sit,” "down,” "heel"— L.P.Wimsey learned to obey.

It really would be worthless to have taken these obedience classes, taught the dog once to "come,” and then to never repeat the lesson until the moment he dashes out into the street in front of a car. "Wimsey, come!" would be to no avail.

We need to teach our children here a little, there a little, line upon line, precept upon precept. And as we train our children in the way they should go, "when they are old they will not depart from it."

Finally, observation number four: The foundation is upon a rock.

Jesus said, "Whoever comes to Me, and hears My sayings and does them, I will show you whom he is like: He is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently against that house, and could not shake it, for it was founded on the rock. But he who heard and did nothing is like a man who built a house on the earth without a foundation, against which the stream beat vehemently; and immediately it fell. And the ruin of that house was great."

Home schooling, in and of itself, is no guarantee of our children being able to withstand the storms of life. Home schooling is merely the vehicle by which we can disciple our children daily in the ways of the Lord. It is as they learn to obey and trust the Lord that they will find their strength to stand.

"... But the people who know their God shall be strong, and carry out great exploits" (Daniel 11:32).

What a description of our living lighthouses: strong and doing great exploits in the Kingdom! This is the cut-to-the-chase, the-buck-stops-here, bottom-line goal for our children. How do we get there? By learning and applying the lessons of the lighthouse.

 Meet Diana Waring

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